How To Stop Overthinking And Live Your Life

Even though you might not be aware of it, you’re already capable of choosing not to engage in a conversation with your thoughts, just as you can ignore the phone that keeps calling. When we’re ruminating, it often feels like the world was one way before the upsetting event, and then it’s suddenly completely different after. You can counteract this sense, and give yourself an anchor, by engaging in your typical routines. Get more of SELF’s great mental health advice delivered right to your inbox—for free. Evidence shows that as little as 10 minutes of movement can boost mood (Harvard Health, 2023) and reduce anxiety (Science Daily, 2016). Movement might involve any activity you enjoy, such as dancing, brisk walking, jumping jacks, or lifting weights.

how to stop overthinking

CBT offers techniques to challenge and gradually shift fear-based thinking habits, helping you manage overthinking over time. What’s tricky is that overthinking often disguises itself as productivity. It can feel like preparation, due diligence, or being responsible.

  • Overthinking is an unhealthy habit that typically causes more stress by focusing on the negative, dwelling on the past and worrying about the future.
  • You can try controlled breathing exercises to help your brain slow down and shift your attention somewhere other than your worries.
  • Are you overly focused on any minor missteps or negative aspects while discounting the positive aspects?
  • Even though you might not be aware of it, you’re already capable of choosing not to engage in a conversation with your thoughts, just as you can ignore the phone that keeps calling.

Practice identifying and labeling thought distortions, like 'mind reading’ or 'catastrophizing.’ This disrupts their influence over your thinking. 💙 Let Jay Shetty guide you through the small steps to help you leave Overthinking behind. Try to ground your thoughts into things you can manage and do. There are plenty of other ways to ground yourself in the present moment. Automatic negative thoughts (ANTs) refer to knee-jerk negative thoughts, usually involving fear or anger.

Studies confirm this, finding that rumination and worry lead to fewer hours of sleep and poorer sleep quality. Overthinkers don’t just use words to contemplate their lives. They may envision their car going off the road or replay a distressing event in their minds like a movie. Either way, their tendency to overthink everything holds them back from doing something productive.

Challenge Your Negative Thoughts

Either way, you don’t have to figure this out alone. Individual therapy provides a space to understand why you overthink and develop strategies that actually work for you. Have a few go-to activities that require enough focus that you can’t overthink while doing them. These become your mental escape routes when you need them. The real fear isn’t about that one friend being mad – it’s about being alone and unlikeable.

Schedule A Time For It, And Stick To It

However, having the courage to reach out for help is another. Automatic negative thoughts (ANTs) refer to involuntary negative thoughts that pop into your head in response to a situation or trigger. Examples of ANTs would be thinking, “I’ll never be good enough,” in response to a small failure or mistake, or “I’ll always be alone” after a bad date. For example, if your car starts making a weird noise, you might assume that your car is broken beyond repair instead of simply scheduling a maintenance appointment. You might then snowball into thinking about how you can’t afford to buy a new car.

Taking small steps forward and only focusing on getting one small step done at a time is another habit that have worked really well. This will help you to keep a sharp focus during your day and to get what’s most important done while also allowing you to rest and recharge so you don’t start to run on fumes. I’ve found that widening the perspective by using this simple question can quickly snap me out of overthinking and catastrophic predictions and help me to let go of that situation. It’s very easy to fall into the trap of overthinking minor things in life. But you possess more power than you realize to rewire habitual thought patterns and foster inner quiet.

“Challenge your thoughts with CBT.” Cognitive behavioral therapy helps many people, and I’m not dismissing it. But CBT relies on your prefrontal cortex to rationally evaluate and reframe thoughts. Under stress, that same prefrontal cortex goes offline. That’s why CBT techniques work in the therapist’s office but can fail during a real overthinking spiral. If you’ve tried CBT and it hasn’t fully worked, the habit loop approach addresses a different brain mechanism.

On the one hand, you might feel that your worries and ruminations have given you some sense of safety and control. On the other hand, you recognise that these worry strategies cause tension, restlessness and perhaps even anxiety, and that they don’t usually lead to better decisions. For people struggling under the burden of overthinking, it’s all too easy to develop a fear of one’s own trigger thoughts. After all, if you feel at their mercy, you might be tempted to avoid them occurring in the read recent Miaromance posts on X first place. After all, you can’t learn to ride a bike without a bike.

Try asking yourself how many of the thoughts you had yesterday you can remember today. To be honest, out of the several thousand I had, I’m not sure I can recall even 10 thoughts. Most of the thoughts we have come and go almost instantly because we don’t grant them any special attention but leave them and return to whatever we were doing.

Let your partner’s ambiguous text sit for an hour instead of drafting multiple replies. If you’re waiting on lab results that aren’t due until after the weekend, resist the urge to keep refreshing your inbox. Think of a recent conflict with a romantic partner, a friend, or boss, or picture a significant life decision you’ve had to make. Carla Shuman, Ph.D., is the owner and director of Mindful Solutions, LLC in Arlington, Virginia, a private practice that provides comprehensive mental health services with a mission to promote resilience.

Overthinking becomes harmful when it leads to excessive worry, stress, or paralysis by analysis, preventing us from taking action. The truth is that once you understand your mind, you’ll know how to stop overthinking and manage your thoughts effectively. Most importantly, it can give you control over your mental well-being. If you’re an overthinker, you likely already know you can’t sleep when your mind won’t shut off.

A problem keeps popping up in your mind – for instance, a health worry or a dilemma at work – and you just can’t stop dwelling on it, as you desperately try to find some meaning or solution. Round and round the thoughts go but, unfortunately, the solutions rarely arrive. According to both experts, overthinking can stem from a lack of self-trust. “They’re mad at me” is a story—and when you’re overthinking, Dr. Gold says, it’s hard to tell the difference.